Too Tired To Sleep

It’s been an extremely long while since I had difficulty sleeping. There are many thoughts swirling through my head that I have been trying to clear off my mind, but I guess thinking about not thinking is still… thinking, right? 😛

One of the more “big” thoughts that I can publicly divulge would be the whole job hunt thing. I guess it does feel a bit scary that it’s actually happening; I’m finally out in the working world, though technically still not *yet* working. Thrown a few résumés at some not-so-random companies, and now just slowly and impatiently waiting for some positive responses, or perhaps ANY response so that at least I know it went through. But I guess this uncertainty is part and parcel of the working world.

I am beginning to despise uncertainty, especially when there’s too much of it. Given that routine can get pretty boring, I am reminded of something I heard once a very long time ago on an Astro preview channel for Lillian Too’s Fengshui talk programme in which she said, “it’s better to have an boring and uneventful year, than to have one with ups and downs,” or something along those lines. In other words, monotony is the way to live if you don’t want to die. But then again that’s not really living anyway.

I guess maybe some things can be left in the air, and some other things are better left grounded and certain. I think there basically needs to at least be a balance between risk-taking and routine-keeping, and I think I kinda have too many risk-eggs in one basket right now that I can’t put back.

Wish me luck!

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